Sunday, March 27, 2005

CoolSJF’s IM chat From Hell

CoolSJF (a pseudonym), a longtime reader of JDaters Anonymous, writes: I've been a non-paying member of jdate for a couple years now and a friend finally convinced me to pay for a month. Believe me, I'm regretting it.... Please see the below, very upsetting IM conversation iIhad with a jdater. I wish there were some way to have him blacklisted. Maybe I should contact Jdate?? What are your thoughts? Should I do anything or just forget about it? [J.A. note: all names have been changed. Some offensive language--and tons of offensive typos-- follows.] weirdosjm: hi coolsjf: yo weirdosjm: whats up beutiful coolsjf: not much. i wish itwere a beautiful day out like it was on monday weirdosjm: i know right coolsjf: i know we've chatted b4, but will u remind me where we met / what your profile is? weirdosjm: jdate, IMmeNow coolsjf: aha that's rigth weirdosjm: good weirdosjm: remember i liked ur smile coolsjf: indeed weirdosjm: so whats up coolsjf: just chillin'. still recuperating from the wkd weirdosjm: i c weirdosjm: so re we going to get some coffee some time? weirdosjm: hello? coolsjf: HA I KNEW IT coolsjf: sorry wrong IM weirdosjm: what? weirdosjm: so r we? weirdosjm: hello? coolsjf: well... coolsjf: the thing is... i'm sort of seeing someone right now weirdosjm: no ur not weirdosjm: y r u on jdate then coolsjf: b/c i just started seeing him weirdosjm: so it dont mean anything coolsjf: doesn't weirdosjm: so y cant we hang out coolsjf: things are pretty crazy weirdosjm: whatever weirdosjm: alot of girls tellme this nad 2 weeks later they r back on jdate coolsjf: fine. coolsjf: well #1 i am seeing someone coolsjf: #2 i am just not that interested weirdosjm: ur not seeing nay one coolsjf: but it's hard to tell someone that coolsjf: i am. weirdosjm: c not interested weirdosjm: i told u coolsjf: but it's 2 reasons weirdosjm: its ok i'll put in that category any way coolsjf: it's a guy in jersey who has come to the city multiple times to take me out. coolsjf: and i think it might be going somewhere. weirdosjm: plus i just looked at ur pic any way weirdosjm: u think? weirdosjm: ok n ever mind, ur oic says it all any way weirdosjm: pic* weirdosjm: ur probabnly a virgin any way coolsjf: so now you are resorting to insulting me? coolsjf: sheesh. weirdosjm: and not clean shaved coolsjf: like that would be a character flaw even if it were true. coolsjf: come on. weirdosjm: yup coolsjf: take rejection like a man. weirdosjm: i c u have no experince weirdosjm: u call that a rejection? weirdosjm: u really have no experince weirdosjm: no wonder ur on the site coolsjf: i am a very fun social girl with a lot of friends and no lack of interested guys. weirdosjm: thats ur problem coolsjf: read it again. coolsjf: try to comprehend. coolsjf: where did you go? YU? weirdosjm: hell no coolsjf: or a technical school that doesn't actually award bachelor degrees? weirdosjm: i am getting my licensce soon and wil make more than people with masters coolsjf: license coolsjf: but at least they can spell coolsjf: and come across as competent, intelligent and caring. weirdosjm: its a c omputer moran coolsjf: moron weirdosjm: i'm chatting with 6 people coolsjf: mazel tov weirdosjm: ;-) thanks bitch coolsjf: so let's stop talking. it's a waste of my time. weirdosjm: ur time? weirdosjm: ok cunt go weirdosjm: and some advise change t he pic on ur profile coolsjf: ADVICE coolsjf: why? 'cause i dont' wear make-up? 'cause i'm honest about what i'm like? weirdosjm: no its more than that coolsjf: don't worry. i've attracted guys who i'm interested in weirdosjm: i'm sure u have that y ur on it every day coolsjf: i'm not going to stoop to insulting you, but your profile is nothing to brag about (pictures and content) coolsjf: actually i'm not,but even if it were true, how would you know it? it would mean that YOU'RE on every day weirdosjm: u know how many emails i get everyday weirdosjm: and its STOP weirdosjm: not stoop coolsjf: no it's STOOP, you imbecile. look it up in a dictionary. weirdosjm: i am on every day the more pussy the better coolsjf: i'm not going to STOOP to insulting you. weirdosjm: u can keep goin coolsjf: stoop as in bend down, get so low and pathetic as to do something. coolsjf: that's the literal definition. the way i used it was figurative. weirdosjm: good so go teach then coolsjf: why don't you go on craig's list if all you want is action ? weirdosjm: i hope this guy see's ur on jdate everyday coolsjf: SEES weirdosjm: whats craigs list weirdosjm: ? coolsjf: oh here you go. please leave jdate forever. go to newyork.craigslist.org -- they have personals sections. it's all free. you can go to "casual encounters." it seems like it's more your speed. weirdosjm: k thanks coolsjf: oh check it. there's a website called f*ckbuddies.com. just what you need. it's for slimey losers who can't find a real relationship. weirdosjm: i dont do that stuff those people arent clean coolsjf: and you are? when were you last tested? given that you say: "i am on every day the more pussy the better" Previous message was not received by weirdosjm because of error: User weirdosjm is not available.

15 comments:

Anonymous said...

yikes I would have just blocked him or closed the convo. THat kind of behavoir is innaporiate. I'd try and report it.

Roz

annabel lee said...

YIKES! That's awful. Ugh.

Vendelascity said...

Ha! I think I've chatted with that same douchebag!

Gatsby said...

Makes me embarassed to be a male.

PepGiraffe said...

I have to say . . . . WTF?

Anonymous said...

I turned off the JDate IM capability as soon as the IM windows kept popping up and annoying me, so I can't speak to how that works. But I will say that I've had a lot of good experiences meeting women on JDate, and I have met some very lovely women with whom I've had strong relationships. I'm a nice guy, and I'm sure I'm not the only one. Don't let one creep sour you from the possibility of meeting someone online.

-A nice guy who can spell, and who believes that the P-word the creep used should be used only to refer to kittens.

annabel lee said...

hey, anonymous -- who are you, how old are you, and where do you live? Maybe JDaters Anonymous could make a shidduch!

Anonymous said...

Dear Annabel Lee,

I'm 43, from NY, and I just started seeing someone (I met her on JDate, we've been out around eight times and so far it's going quite well).

But thanks!

-Shaun (the 2nd anonymous poster)

Anonymous said...

why keep the IM going if the guy is so horrible? Log off.

Sarah said...

I love reading other people's IM conversations (although I didn't understand half of that one due to the use of letters as word abbreviations).

The problem is, the girl *did* stoop to that idiot guy's level. Of course, it made it a treat for me to read, but still. If she wasn't interested she shouldn't have let the chat go on. Why didn't she just close the window? The guy clearly wanted to get a rise out of her and he got that.

Anonymous said...

I think they are both screwed up. He was being a pest and an aggressive jerk yet she didnt make it clear she wasnt interested in dating. If she was seeing someone, she should have said she cant at the moment because she is seeing someone and when he continued, to persist and say no and if he still persisted, to say bye. If she wasn't, she should have just said she wasnt interested. Its important to be clear because if you show confusion, then, us as guys (the chasers) will persist.

Daphna said...

Okay, the guy is clearly a loser but her behavior left something to be desired as well.

1) If you are dating someone, why hang out on Jdate? Poor form. It reminds me of a friend of mine who used to go to singles events when he was already engaged.

2) If you do wish to hang out on Jdate while dating someone, at least have the class not to use "I am dating someone" as an excuse not to meet someone who expresses interest.

3) If you are not interested, simply say, no, but thank you, and firmly but politely end the conversation.

4) The average plumber probably *does* make more money than many people with MA's, and the average plumber does not have a BA and may or may not be a whiz at spelling. I do not know what this guy's profession is, but he may be telling the truth about his earning potential.

Anonymous said...

I agree with Sarah.This Guy was def inappropiate but if she is not available than why is she wasting time on jdate im with some loser.Ill tell ya why because she is not happy with the guy and wants more action!

Anonymous said...

wow. i've met guys like that on jdate too. really sad. anyway, i can sympathize with her. maybe she was getting a kick out of riling up a real a-hole... as immature as that might have been! sometimes saying you're seeing someone is easier for a guy's ego than to say, well i think you're uninteresting / unintelligent / ugly !!

DrinkingTea said...

Amazing. I think I've run into this character (or one of his many clones) online, too.

Yeah, you know you shouldn't keep chatting, but it's that whole train wreck mentality that takes hold when you come across someone like that.