Friday, September 10, 2004
RIDING TO ROMANCE
Catch a cab, get a date This article in the Wall Street Journal is about a cabbie named Mr. Ibrahim who asks selected riders if they are single and looking. If they are, he records a short audio interview with them, and sets them up when he meets a rider who he thinks might be a suitable date: Mr. Ibrahim finds that New Yorkers are a tough crowd to please. "All the guys want Britney Spears," says Mr. Ibrahim, "And the girls are very, very picky." Oh, he's not wrong, in either case... The Tall and the Short of It New Yid on the blog The Buddha comments about the height issue. If you've been dating in the Jewish community, you know what I mean. Most Jewish women are looking for a taller man, even if they themselves are more petite women. (I had one friend who was just five feet tall, and often dated men who were 6'3 or 6'4. I maintain that there's no need to date someone more than a foot taller than you.) And a lot of men have a psychological problem dating someone taller. The Buddha wants you to know that he doesn't have this problem. But you know what the real issue is? I think that people focus on height because it's an unchangeable, objective tangible, as opposed to something that's less subjective like personality or sense of humor, or chemistry. You click with someone, and sometimes you can identify why. But the lack of click sometimes needs a scapegoat too. And I think people use height as that kind of patsy, as a way to rule someone out in a way that "doesn't really hurt their feelings," because after all, you can't change your height. Unless you have that Willy Wonka stretching machine that he used on Mike Teevee after he was turned into a Mini-Mike after being sent by television. Also, the fact that height is not objective is the reason that so many women on JDate are upset when guys lie on their profiles about this element. If you're 5'5, and claim 5'9, and we meet you, we're gonna know. Even if you wear lifts on the first date, at some point, those shoes are coming off and then we'll know. Representing yourself as four-to-six inches taller represents a divorcement from reality--we only care if you lie. So, an unsolicited but helpful hint: Be honest about your height at the forefront. I know it's hard, but it's better in the long run.