Friday, April 07, 2006

And That's Why Men Should Kiss Men and Women Should Kiss Women...

Too many episodes of Queer as Folk and The L-Word for Esther? Perhaps. But that's not the point of this NY Times article about the art (and artifice) of the social kiss, especially in business settings.
The kiss is "happening more and more," agreed Peggy Post, a spokeswoman for the Emily Post Institute founded by the doyenne of etiquette. "We're much more informal in everything from the clothes we wear to how we greet people." Ms. Post advocates the handshake and agrees that it's better "to steer clear of kissing people of the opposite sex, which can be misconstrued in some cases." This is especially true on first meetings. Later, kissing as a greeting depends on the relationship, she and others said. [emphasis mine--edk]
I think the answer is for all of us to become shomer negiah all the time except for when we are in relationships with other people. Think of the clarity: first of all, no awkward business kisses. (Or Shabbos kisses, if any of you remember those boggling busses from that time between the Friday night service and dinner at Camp Ramah or USY Conventions.) Secondly, you'd never have to ask "What is the deal with those two? Are they dating or not?" nor would you ever have to answer "Well, no one knows for sure." Kissing etiquette is hard. So that's why I'm glad my staff of research assistants sends me articles like these, with helpful hints buried on page two of the article, like the fact that Blistex maintains a section on kissing etiquette (and pretty much anything you'd ever want to know about lips) on their site. On a not wholly unrelated note, today I bought two new lipglosses. Smooches, everyone! Or not...

4 comments:

Caryn said...

Are you saying no more peck on the cheek when you greet a girl friend hello? Or just not with male friends?

It has become pretty standard in New York. I realize that when I go other places, where a hug might be more common. I like to attribute it to our New Yorkness, and we've always got our hands full of our busy days (no cars to leave stuff in) and it's easier to lean over for a kiss, instead of put your stuff down to offer a hug. Hahaha.

Chutzpah said...

Esther, good thing you are wearing lip-gloss because with your excessively funny and smart wit, some guys might confuse you with one of those unfeminine comedians like Rosie, Paula, or Ellen and put you in the lebian, strike that, friends zone. Jewish Mother would be proud. Love that new Neutrogena gloss... it tingles, cools and plumps...probably be great when giving head, strike that, er...sunbathing.

simcha said...

I hope your new lipstick is being put to the test. Keep us posted if you like.

I just googled this:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kiss

The longest recorded kiss took place in Tel Aviv, Israel, on April 5, 1999, between Karmit Tsubera and Dror Orpaz. It lasted 30 hours and 45 minutes...

An inspiring thought for your Pesach. Simcha

Needsabetterjob said...

I don't understand the cryptic message j,
"L" word? U have been toying w/ this notion for some time. I can infer that you are seeing/chatting w/ someone and are turned on to this?

I still think you should do some therapeutic work in a group setting, in case you have not. the power of a supportive group is tremendous. It helps you to make some action oriented decisions, whilest when you are alone, you can always put things off...

Good luck. see you in Israel.