Friday, April 15, 2005

Tired of Endless Dating? Might As Well Eat...

According to Reuters in London, speed dating is out, and "feed dating" is in, "where the love-hungry can at least enjoy a good meal if they don't find romance." Meeting people at dinner parties has become the most popular way for Britons in their 30s to find a new partner, according to a survey by food firm Geest. Of 1,000 single people, 34 percent said they wanted to combine food with flirting -- with a safety net of having friends with them if the dinner date went pear-shaped. Because JDaters Anonymous is a service-based weblog, we are pleased to provide you with this handy list of things to avoid when "feed dating": 1. The Blooming Onion (greasy oil all over face and hands is almost never a portent of romance) 2. Any garlic-based dishes (no explanation is required, is it?) 3. Pesto (believe me, this one is bad--no matter how many times you try to dislodge the stuff from the crevices between your teeth, it's not coming out until you brush it out with some Crest or Colgate later at home...) 4. Poppy seed bagels (see "pesto") 5. Deli (deli is not sexy...except maybe pastrami, with its blend of pungent spices, which can get stuck in your teeth, see "pesto") 6. Red wine (it stains your teeth almost instantly, and certain colors of long-wearing lipstick actually can also pick up the tint, creating a "clown mouth" effect...don't ask me how I know that...) 7. Grapefruit (no way to eat this and not spritz your date in the eye with a blinding spray of citrus) 8. Chocolate (because of the teeth thing--see "pesto"--, and because it may remind you that you have no need for companionship of the opposite sex) 9. Matzah (crumbles into a million specks that will instantly adhere to clothing and make you look like you suffer from gargantuan dandruff) 10. Pasta with red sauce (because you will ALWAYS spill it all over yourself, especially if you're wearing white) Not quite the Ten Commandments. But I think they're decent suggestions.

1 comment:

EeshAish said...

We are still finding tremendous success w/ speed dating. I have made over 100 matches over the past few years, w/ many children born and put into the Chinuch system.