Friday, July 07, 2006

Miles Away, In More Ways Than One

I write this from Jerusalem, after having been away for almost three weeks, and with two more to go. I can't guarantee that I'm making any sense in this post, or that it's concretely related to dating. But it is about relationships, altered consciousness, and the intensely frightening and intensely sought state of change. Miles away--rather, thousands of miles away--you hope for some sort of perspective in absentia, for clarity to emerge as you unimmerse yourself from the dailyness of you and revisit the decisions and emotions that you've experienced in the past. You hope for it. Sometimes, especially in Holy Cities, you pray for it. And eventually and to an extent, it comes, at odd moments when you're unprepared for it, or can't experience it viscerally, or can't write it down. But clarity brings responsibility. Running away isn't an option, and words spill forth on their own, leaving you behind. The things you are and the things you do must be the same. But if sentences seem disjointed as they emerge, is the march really toward clarity or toward something else? The wonderings are as wanderings, meandering in and out of meaning until clarity has engendered a new confusion. More topical posts to come...

2 comments:

Caryn said...

"clarity brings responsibility"
I like that. Can't wait to see you when you get back!

Passionate Life said...

E,

Your words ring true for all who have made journeys and are open to soul searching. May you find the clarity you seek and have the courage to enact that clarity even when the experience begins fading from memory.

Have a phenomenal trip! We are all looking forward to reading about it.

P-Life ;-)